As I know I’ve mentioned already, I had a really busy summer. We were on the road a LOT. When we finally settled in our Greek home for a month it was really good to be back home with my stuff – my furniture, my kitchen — and see good friends and stay in one place that felt so comfortable and familiar. But as our stay neared the end, part of me was ready to go back home to Manila and move on with our lives. Isn’t that what vacations are all about? A much needed break from the usual grind, followed by a recognition that we all need routine in our lives. I loved my time there and was sad to leave, but I was also ready to go back to work.
But we returned to the devastating floods that consumed 60-80% of this city, and rain and rain and more rain. Of course its the rainy season here, “wet” is expected, but there’s rain and then there’s rain…. I was not expecting two continual weeks of deluge. And while I sat in my apartment feeling trapped, I knew that my problems were nothing compared to the suffering of others just a few streets away. And yet the selfish feeling of boredom and discontent set in and coloured my view of the world.
The last two weeks since I’ve been back feels like two months, and I’ve been having trouble seeing the fun of being here in Manila. Instead I’ve been seeing all the annoyances: the traffic, the lack of open space, the difficulty of just going for a walk, wanting to just be able to jump in my car and go….. Coupled with my sense of missing Greece and a rotten week at work, this has to be my low in almost two years of living here. Blogging about these annoyances always seems petty in retrospect, and I usually avoid it. But it creates a space in my blogging diary until the next event or interesting thing comes along, which perpetuates the image that some have, I’m sure, that life is one long beach trip or adventure. Right now, ignoring that space — all the time — feels sort of dishonest. No-one needs to hear about all my bad petty days, even if I can find the talent to write about them with sufficient humour or insight. But a concession to add a little balance seems called for … so here it is: Manila sucks right now!
A return to our usual programming follows shortly……
Misery loves company, right? Anyway, just to let you know you’re not alone. I was feeling like that pre-R&R, and I thought the break would do me good, and though I missed Manila by the end of my two weeks, I came back and realized I wasn’t gone long enough. It didn’t help that arriving at the airport was a clusterf*** but since then, the annoyances are still getting to me… Hope it passes, we’re still here for quite a loooong time…
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Thanks Carla. I was gone for two months and ready to come back, and largely am happy here. But something about not being able to go for a walk is really getting to me right now….. I guess I was getting used to life on the trail!
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I had a similar experience coming back to Chengdu after R&R last year! I thought I was supposed to be happy to be back and instead I just felt this sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach as we flew lower and lower into the cloud cover. After a few weeks though, it really did start to feel good to be back but it took some time!
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Better to share the truth with us-when things suck, there’s nothing wrong with saying so!
Hope it gets better real soon.
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Understand completely!! It’s only 12 months until you can change your heading to ‘Wright Outta Manila’,………it will pass quickly! Jenny x
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How refreshingling honest Caroline, its a shame more people can’t be like that. I’m sure the down feeling passed quickly. Hey, its only 3 and half months until we come out to see you in Manila, focus on that!! xxx
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